CHRISMAS ?!

Ahh , 2 more days to my own chrismas at Japan ! Imagine the snow falling down from the sky ~ :D

How exciting. I'm looking forward to that day. Morning 5.30 am plane. (: But must reach airport like about 2 hours earlier ?! So tomorrow must go my cousin's house for farewell dinner . I'm gonna miss my mum and Singapore. (:

Hahas , thanks everyone for your wishes. :D
Not much YEN left after all the payment of transport and living expenses . So i won't be buying too much gifts for everyone , just for some real close friends. (:

I'm a burden ...

If i knew that things would go this way , i'd rather stay at home then go Japan . Why ? Why must god give me such a cruel life ? If there's not enough money for both me and my sis to go Japan , i'd rather stay at home. Wasted ? Not at all , because this might be the outcome they want . Perhaps , i'm not much of an importance to them . I'm a real heavy burden ... I'm like a giant piece of walking junk. If i don't exist , will they have lesser burdens ? I've completely lost hope in life. I shouldn't be alive. Goodbye .

RELATIVES ?!

Today she showed me the brand new laptop that my father's side's cousin bought for her. I hate to admit but i'm jealous. I envy her . Everytime i see that laptop , i feel like throwing it down the apartment . Why ? Because she has it and i don't . You can say that i'm selfish , but who's fault is it to blame ? Oh great , we're all going to my father's side's relative's home soon. I hate it. I guess i should just go and do nothing . Meaning , rot there. I don't understand , i really don't . Why does everything good goes to her ? What am i to them ? Relatives ? What are relatives to you all ? To me , they aren't a SHIT . They're pratically useless and blood-related strangers. I don't need relatives ! Sigh , but what can i do ? Nothing ...
Gtg soon , cya all !

不公平的世界...

从小，我的姐姐的一切，是我想要的一切。但是，我从来没有一次获得这一切。

为什么？为什么这个世界这么的不公平？
I'm always wondering , why does SHE get everything while i don't ? Yea , from a young age , my elder SISTER gets everything she wants , brand new things. While me ? Either its old or unwanted.
WHY ? WHY ? WHY ?
This world is just so unfair ! My aunt is buying a new computer for HER . Yea. 3 computers brought for her already , and now a FOURTH one . Why does everything goes to her ? I hate my relatives from my father's side. Including my father in the 'Father's side'.
 I don't request for something ridiculous like a plasma TV or something . I just want a computer that belongs to me , that does not belong to HER . Because i've grown up. I don't want to stay up all day to just wait for a few hours of computer. I don't want to be like a dog and beg her all the time . I'm sick and tired of days like this . I want it all to be over. But , do you know how i feel ? I don't voice out anything at home . When i get blamed , i'll sit in silence and just listen. I really want to say a few words of justice , but i didn't . Why can't you just understand how i feel ? WHY ?
Why is this world always so unfair and cruel to me ? I'm really lost now ... Really . Someone tell me what to do !

HELLO !

Hello all ! I'm back to blogging ! Why ? Maybe because i'm unable to tell people about my problems anymore. I just can't stand storing up , so i'll pour it all out on the blog. Haha...

                                        Well , i guess no one will know about this blog or if i HAVE a blog . Even if someone do know , i don't think anyone would want to read it . Cuz my blog is boring. (:
Later then post , cya !